Crystal Clear Philosophy

My mother was the queen of recycling and reusing, and never threw anything away. She believed that everything could be repurposed. Our old bedsheets would be transformed into furniture covers, or rags, or floor mats. Old pajamas would reincarnate into pillow covers and floor mops and many other new forms with her seemingly magical touch. Despite her penchant for holding on to things, our home was never a mess. On the contrary, my mom put in a lot of effort to keep everything nice, tidy, and in pristine condition. She was reluctant to use her best vases, or dishes other than to accommodate very special guests on equally special occasions.

Once I was spring cleaning at my parent's house. I had just started working in a private firm after getting my diploma in architecture and was still living with my parents. That day I targeted a cupboard full of miscellaneous stuff; one shelf of sewing supplies and stationery, another of address books, receipts and pocket change, etc. The top shelf of that cupboard held my mother's most valuable possessions: a bone china tea set, a few fine china bowls, and three extremely thin and delicate blue glass tumblers.

"...another slight tug in the other direction resulted in the unmistakable sound of a crack."

I was extra careful when cleaning that shelf. I used a soft duster for dust and a wet rag for stubborn smudges, while I put aside dirty bowls and glasses for further washing. During this time, I noticed one of the blue tumblers was stuck inside another one. A gentle tug didn't work; however, another slight tug in the other direction resulted in the unmistakable faint sound of a crack.

I vividly remember that hot afternoon of March. I was sweating naturally as it was a summer month in India, but I can't remember if I went cold or even hotter. The outer glass was cracked and I could see that the crack was quickly beginning to spread like a spider web. By the time I got down from the chair, my mom was by my side. I could feel her dismay and shock. I found myself too shocked to apologize because, as if out of sympathy for the now broken glass, the other glass started to crack too! Part of me felt totally cheated by the pair of old blue glasses. How could such gentle tug turn into such destruction?

If you always save an item for the perfect time but never end up using it, the item becomes useless.

I believe that if you always save an item for the perfect time but never end up using it, the item eventually becomes useless until one day you are too sick to use it at all, or as in this case, it breaks. Once the glasses broke, they could never be used again, making previous occasions seem like they could have been perfect occasions. Thinking back, I couldn't remember her using those blue glasses for any special guests at all. They were so special to her.

A few days later when we were in a better mood, I asked her about those glasses. I told her that to me, the most painful part of the loss was that they were saved for so many years without being used even once. When I heard the story, I finally understood why.

"... they were leaving behind almost all of their possessions, lifestyles, and memories."

My mom had received the blue glasses from her mom, my grandmother. After the partition of India, her family had to flee from Bangladesh to India for safety, just like millions of other families. Taking only essentials, they left behind almost all of their possessions, lifestyles, and memories. The few belongings they managed to bring along with them were very valuable mementos, almost as if they were a part of their lost identity.

Losing those glasses, having never used them, changed both of our perspectives greatly. I understood the value that items can hold, especially those which represent a piece of our history and identity. She understood my point as well and agreed to use her remaining special items less conservatively.

Fast forward to the present day...

As her daughter, I tend to hold on to objects that I may use in the future, and also find myself waiting for "the perfect opportunity" to use certain 'nice' things.

We have a display cabinet in our kitchen for crystal and fine dinnerware sets. Over 30 years of married life I had accumulated quite a sizeable collection of crystal glassware; some were purely decorative, like crystal souvenirs, while others were beautiful and had practical uses, like crystal vases, varieties of wine flutes, shot glasses from different places we traveled, crystal milk and sugar pot sets, candy bowls, etc.

As I preached to my mom 30 years ago, I tried not to hold onto nice stuff for special guests on special occasions only. When I started Mira Creations, I even used a few of them as props for taking photos of my pieces of jewelry! That thought was my only solace when you guessed it, I broke several glasses of my own!

"Two shelves full of crystal glassware were destroyed in less than 5 seconds."

I was cooking alone in the kitchen at about 6 feet away from that cabinet. Nobody touched the cabinet or bumped into it, but suddenly, I heard a loud rumble like the sound a thundering waterfall would make if instead of gallons of water, it was breaking glass tumbling over the edge.

I turned and witnessed a spectacular sight that I hope nobody reading this ever has to see; the doors of the cabinet flew open and an avalanche of crystal burst through the now open doors and went crashing onto the floor. The top shelf holding heavy vases and glasses had weakened over the years and gave way, landing at an angle on the second shelf. In the process, all the glass items from the top shelf slid and forced the door open before landing on the floor. The heavy tempered glass shelf didn't break and landed on the second shelf, breaking everything on that shelf as well. Two shelves full of glassware, collected over my 30-year marriage, had been obliterated in less than five seconds.

The afternoon sun illuminated the whole scene. My mind cycled through all the items on those two shelves, as I thought "There goes all my crystal vases.... and international shot glass collection... and wine goblet set... and gifts from friends.... and...", At one point, an involuntary cry of shock must have escaped from me since before I knew it, my whole family rushed into the kitchen and skidded to a halt. The whole kitchen floor was sparkling with crystal shards. It was the show of a lifetime.

"I could take comfort in knowing that they had been well used and well-loved"

After one hour of collective family effort, all sharp pieces of glass were disposed of safely, the floor was swept twice, vacuumed, and mopped, and I finally sat down, tired. My hubby handed me a glass of wine in an intact liquor glass (a few of them miraculously survived). I was still in shock and sad about losing so many beautiful things with so many memories at once. But my loss was not full of regret like my mom's for her precious glasses, because I could take comfort in knowing that they had been well used and well-loved. And the wine in a liquor glass offered by my loving, considerate husband, tasted so good!